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Teddy Kennedy: Shovel ready in America

The only thing that is “shovel ready” in America today is Teddy Kennedy’s corpse and casket. Fortunately for his mortician, Kennedy had already embalmed himself.

One can only pray that his brand of insane, unrealistic, and very expensive liberalism will be buried with him, but that is not likely so long as our Marxist President draws breath.

With considerable schadenfreude I watched as William Kristol, founder and editor of The Weekly Standard, choked back his utter disdain for Teddy Kennedy during a panel discussion on the Fox News. Columnist Charles Krauthammer had nothing good to say of Kennedy either and it was to both their credit they did not feign any regret over his passing beyond the standard expression of sympathy for his family.

After prayers are said over his bloated remains, he will be interred in Arlington cemetery beside his brothers Jack and Bobby. The baby of the family, an indifferent student, boozer, womanizer, and bloviator, Teddy managed to get to the far Left of his more distinguished brothers.

Their careers in public service were as proxies for their power-mad father who rose from poverty as a bootlegger. These days he would probably be driving an 18-wheeler full of cigarettes from North Carolina to Boston.

He wanted, believe it or not, to be president, but FDR put an end to that nonsense. When oldest son, Joe, Jr., died in World War II, he turned to Jack to fulfill that ambition. The dutiful son complied, greatly assisted by the brilliant Ted Sorenson and the flamboyant, best character of the group that got him elected, Pierre Salinger. To the astonishment of everyone, Jack picked brother Bobby to be his Attorney General. They were a tight-knit family, the Kennedys.

When Bobby was assassinated during his campaign to become president (by a Palestinian—something that nobody ever bothers to mention), daffy, pudgy little Teddy was shoved in line to fulfill the same demented ambition. Only the drowning of Mary Jo Kopechne, something he failed to report for more than 24 hours, put a stop to his presidential ambitions.

This is America’s “dynasty”? That was “Camelot”? The Soviet Union’s clownish Nikita Krushchev took a look at Jack and decided he could get away with putting long-range missiles in Cuba. He was mistaken.

Can you even imagine what comparable world leaders today are thinking of Barack Obama who wet his pants trying to decide whether to kill some Somali pirates that were holding an American ship captain captive and for ransom? Who couldn’t find a good word to say for the brave Iranians in the streets of Tehran protesting that monster, Ahmadinejad and the crazed ayatollahs? Et cetera!

Now the Democrats, who can’t find enough votes among their own pathetic herd in Congress, the majority party, intend to rename the totally Socialist “universal healthcare” bill after Teddy in a lame effort to ram it through despite polls and town hall meetings, phone calls, emails and faxes by the hundreds of thousands denouncing it.

If passed would hasten the bankruptcy of a nation rendered bankrupt by Obama and the Democrats. What a legacy!

As the Irish are fond of saying, let us be about our Father’s work. Let’s shovel Teddy under and get on with saving the nation from the likes of him and those to whom he has passed the torch.

About the Author

Alan Caruba, a business and science writer, is the founder of The National Anxiety Center. He blogs daily at http://factsnotfantasy.blogspot.com.

Discussion

5 comments for “Teddy Kennedy: Shovel ready in America”

  1. [...] original here: Teddy Kennedy: Shovel ready in America | SmallGovTimes.com Share and [...]

    Posted by Teddy Kennedy: Shovel ready in America | SmallGovTimes.com | americantoday | August 26, 2009, 10:14 pm
  2. Shovel-ready indeed. If he had been subjected to the healthcare bill, he would still be in the waiting room to see his doctor.

    At least they will be saving a fortune in embalming fluid.

    God help us all if they decide to cremate him. We’ll all be killed.

    No senator has ever given so much to the world…. of stand-up comedy.

    Posted by Live Free | August 27, 2009, 5:07 am
  3. Dead Kennedy, and good riddance.

    Posted by Rob | August 27, 2009, 5:55 am
  4. Go fuck yourselves you fucking vultures. The man just died. I hope when you die people speak as ill of you as you have of him. Have a little respect, you’re the reason this country is going to be destroyed, because you are sin berguenso!

    Posted by Chris | August 27, 2009, 8:21 am
  5. Why Chris what do you mean? Shovel Ready Teddy is an ode to the Stimulus Package the Senator supported.

    Feel better?

    Posted by Old Ugly | August 29, 2009, 7:03 am

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